Wednesday, February 24, 2016

TIME FOR AN UPGRADE ON THE OS, GOD!

Having just clicked on the OS upgrade for my iPhone 6 and my iPad, I am suddenly aware how necessary this improved software is if we are to continue with security features and swifter actions over the internet, as well as other bells and whistles.

So it struck me:  How come God doesn't give us an upgrade on our operating system? I seriously think we need one, and I am a bit annoyed with our creator for not for seeing this. Here are some modest suggestions for crucial areas which need tweaking:

1/ Get rid of the appendix.  Maybe in Neanderthal times it served a purpose, but now it just seems to be this wiggly, fleshy thing which gets infected when we are hiking in the Andes, or, in my case, produces a weird little tumor on the end, kind of like a pinky ring.

2/ Sinuses, really, God? What WERE you thinking of? Even doctors confess that these are a bad design--hard to drain, difficult to keep clean, and liable to build up toxic bacteria which cause headaches and infections that
make grown adults cry.

3/ Why give the elephants all those grand cancer-fighting genes, oh, Holy One? What, we weren't good enough for you? Why do pachyderms need them and not us? So please, when you are figuring out the new OS, transfer some of those great genes into our human bodies.  I sure could use some as well as many other people I know!

4/ Also, the joints. Seriously. Hips and knees?  I realize the life-span of humans used to be around 40 years, but now with modern medicine and better diets we are living far into our 70s. I am not suggesting Teflon or some odd metal, but perhaps super-dense hip and knee joints would do well.

These are just a few ideas, Lord, which would make human life on earth a bit easier and more festive. You notice I didn't say anything about replacing human violence and hatred with love and mercy. I think you are already working on that one.

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