WHAT DOES IT MEAN TO BE AF?

In case you haven't come across this acronym, it stands for "Alcohol Free." This Catholic Broad has been AF since Nov. 7th after a mere 2 glasses of white wine out at a restaurant.  I felt so damn crappy the next day: extreme neuropathy in legs, tingling feet, dizziness, muzzy thinking, and low mood. In short, a freakin' wreck. Clearly, recovering from chemo and drinking wine do not mix at all!

So, I thought, it's time to go back to James Swanwick's "The 30-Day No-Alcohol Challenge," which I had tried last year around the holidays, making it to Day 17. Then I caved. Surprisingly, I didn't notice the benefits in my body a year ago, but this year, I am really tuned into the changes.

1/ Less neuropathy (I think alcohol increases this.)
2/ More energy.
3/ A feeling of spaciousness in my lungs and chest.
4/ Clearer head.
5/ More optimistic mood.

This is how I signed up: I thought if I put some money down for the 30-day program, I might be more committed. And that's just what happened. Along with joining this month-long challenge, I got daily videos from James with lots of helpful tips about: putting the wine out of my house; not putting myself in difficult social situations where everyone is drinking, for the time being; making a list of all the benefits I saw for not drinking; setting a goal and identifying a mentor. And more. It's made a HUGE difference to me in keeping on track.

When I started, I definitely felt wine cravings for several days (and do at times now if I am honest). I used to sip 1 glass while cooking, and another at the meal. And if sometimes a tad more wine slopped into my glass, that would be business as usual. Did I have a nightly buzz on? You bet. Was I muzzy and feeling that all I could cope with would be scrolling through Pinterest? You bet.

But by Day 3 of the challenge, I was beginning to feel the burn, as Jane Fonda used to say: reduced neuropathy, clearer head, and enough energy to power through my days. On one of these days I did so much it surprised us all:

1/ Exercised for 30 minutes to aerobic DVD.
2/ Wrote a new short story about a girl who imitates St. Clare.
3/ Walked the dog.
4/ Cleaned mouse poop off shelves in pantry; sprayed and wiped them down, the shelves not the mice; put all visible foods in closed glass jars; and organized them.
5/ Made chili for supper. Whew! I was proud!

James has set up his program with a closed FB site, where you "talk" to others trying to get sober, failing, getting back on the horse, reaching 3 days sober and 60 days without alcohol. You get nifty little golden digital badges for special days you reach. 

Accountability is a huge part of stopping drinking--whether you are a habitual 2 glasses of wine per night person, like me, or a bottle or two a night, like some others. On the FB site, people see if you have kept your promise and the challenge. It keeps me honest. I want that damn 30-day badge!!!

I also learned surprising things on the site: some folks literally drink 2 bottles of wine a night, and one woman drank 15 shots a day of vodka. Having tried several times to get sober (using lots of tools and groups, but failing) she, being the smart woman she is, found a place outside of Philadelphia where she received this amazing treatment--NAD-IV infusions. Check it on Google. I know it sounds woo-woo, but it works by infusing massive amounts of nutrients and vitamins into your body (damaged from years of alcohol) in a daily 4-hour session. She was there for 10 days.  It is all under medical supervision, with counselors, doctors, and an anti-seizure med given at the beginning

Not easy, not cheap, but this amazing woman now has no cravings, is healthy, and feels clear-headed for the first time in decades. One perspective is that these infusions heal the damage done to your neurotransmitters. I could use that. My brain, after chemo, feels like a junkyard dog. (I expect my daily wine drinking didn't help either!)

Anyone who wants to join the discussion about being AF, please do. I love and welcome comments. You all are on your own journeys--trying to decide if you want to drink, how much and how often. Like that. Will I go back to wine? I am feeling that what I need to do now is sign up for the 90-day challenge. I am on a roll and hate to go back to former destructive habits, no matter how delicious.