Hi, there. This is your fellow friendly cancer survivor sitting in her chair, trying not to gain weight, planning a reheating of leftovers, and wondering when she can pour herself a crisp glass of Chardonnay.  No, wait. I am trying for one glass and not TWO today, because there seems to be some evidence (can't pin it down yet) that alcohol consumption can contribute to Secondary Cancers. REALLY? Bad enough we had 3 Primary Cancers (Uterine, Stage 1, carcinoid tumor 2.1 cm., Ovarian Stage 1), but now I have to fret myself silly about Secondary Cancers? What the hell?

I gather that could be anything from: colon, bladder, lung, etc. as well as--Becoming a Republican, Having Voted for Trump, Cheering on J. Comey, Planning on Gutting the Dept. of Energy, and, oh, yeah, Repealing the AcA, just in case I needed health care for a pre-existing condition. Like cancer. Again I cry, What the Hell?

I meant this to be a lighthearted, jokey blog about being in "Remission" or "Survivorship", as I had a funny conversation with an older friend about which term we preferred. As a long-term survivor, she likes "Remission." I stand by "Survivorship," as it sounds somehow--more manly. Tougher. As if I had just jumped 60 feet into a stormy sea and have managed to grab some floating wreckage until I am rescued. "Remission" sounds like banking, like "Receivership," i.e. health bankruptcy.  Guess we'll be seeing a hell of a lot of THAT in the coming years, if the GOP has their deadly way.

Back to the jokey part of this post on a dismal day. Just for chuckles, I did a Google Search for the Best Cancer Blogs of 2016 and found a few useful things, but nothing up my alley--which is faith and cancer. Frankly, I don't know how ANYONE gets through life with mind and heart intact without faith, but that is my prejudice. ("But I know I am right. This will be the best faith you have ever seen or heard of! It will be the biggest faith too!")

I hope none of you out there in FB land will have to confront cancer, but if you do, keep this handy-dandy tool kit by you just in case:

                                        SURVIVORSHIP TOOL KIT (free!)

--a loving spouse or partner
--fabulous, funny friends
--Blue Apron or HelloFresh which comes to your DOOR
--a lively pet with fur, not an iguana, a snake, a snail, or a cricket
--a house or apartment with big windows to let in God's light and nature
--loving brothers and sisters (thanks, Nick and Peter and dear spouses!)
--a faith community, or, if you will, a dharma community
--great adult "kids" who know just when to show up when you are having a slobbery meltdown
--the sun coming up each day
--chestnut-sided nuthatches, hummingbirds, Pileated woodpeckers, Barred Owls and more
--G.K. Chesterton
--Fr. Bobby Barron & his inspiring YouTube reflections
--a Writers' Group for when you don't have the spoons, which is almost always, to go shopping on your own or do errands
--the Bible
--a really good manicurist who is a liberal and likes to talk politics
--Great makeup to hide pallor (thanks Dr. Hauschka bronze tint)
--great pastors and a one-of-a-kind priest, you know who you are

Did I miss anything?  Ah, music and reruns of "Downton Abby" and "Call the Midwife." "Sherlock" is off my Christmas list as my chemo brain simply understand it.

So, yeah, I am going with Survivorship, despite the dizzy spells, wobbly legs, and ratty chemo brain. I'm holding onto the wreckage for dear life, and I know, I truly and deeply know--as much as I know that God is closer to me than my own breath and my own heartbeat--that I am going to either be rescued by some fit, tan, gorgeous guy on a cruise ship, or I shall wash ashore on a Caribbean beach with a chair, a rum drink, an umbrella, and all of my peeps around me.


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